How to Move Out of Your Parents’ House Without Breaking Their Heart

Posted How-to / November 30, 2021
Anastasia Hill

Apart from being the next fashion icon, Anastasia is also a freelance writer and expert on moving (and packing clothes).

If you’re a young person ready to live on your own, you’re probably wondering how to move out of your parents’ house without hurting their feelings and keeping your sanity. These are challenging situations, especially if you’re the only or the youngest child. They might even try making it about them when in reality, you’re all very aware that this doesn’t mean that you don’t love them. You simply want more privacy and the opportunity to experience something different.

This Might Be One of the Most Challenging Periods in Your Life, Make Sure You Don’t Give Up

No matter if you’re packing for college and relocating to some of the best cities for education or want to experience some new opportunities and relocate to one of the best cities for millennials, leaving your parents’ warm nest will eventually come up. This isn’t easy, and it requires a lot of courage. People always look for comfort and want to live in a peaceful environment where all of their needs are met.

What is a better place than the one where you spent your entire childhood and made some of the best memories? Well, the nest you’ll build on your own. Leaving all of this and your parents’ safe hug and support might be difficult – both for you and for them. They spend many years working and trying to afford you everything you ever wished for, and now comes the time when they have to let you go struggle with many challenges without their assistance.

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Why Is it Important to Be Patient During This Period?

Although this is technically your life journey and your personal transition, you have to understand that you’ll always be a part of your family no matter where you go. However, your parents have to accept that you’re no longer a little child. Sometimes they can act overprotective and even feel disappointed if you say you want to leave the home they built for you. This is why you can’t tell them this all of a sudden.

It is better to start preparing the ground for breaking the news gradually. For example, you can mention that most of your friends are relocating for college and you are thinking about doing the same thing. Just to let them know that there is a possibility and check their reaction. It will probably be less dramatic than telling them you’re having a last-minute move and leaving tomorrow without telling them anything.

What Reactions You Can Expect and What Are the Ways to Deal With Them

Are you familiar with the empty nest syndrome? This is a popular term in modern psychology used to describe parents being left alone without their children. This syndrome is more common among women who define themselves through motherhood. They might feel like they have lost their purpose in life. It is related to grief and different emotions and thoughts such as:

  • Depression after relocation,
  • Feeling of loneliness and hopelessness,
  • Stress and anxiety,
  • Feeling overwhelmed with worrying,
  • Feeling of rejection. 

These are some of the common psychological symptoms that are related to this syndrome and can lead to severe health problems such as migraines, higher blood pressure, and digestive issues. This is why it is important that parents learn how to cope with these negative emotions and accept the new reality as something that can bring them joy even though they won’t be spending as much time with their children.

They have to learn how to share children’s excitement about the upcoming change and, by acting generally interested, stay included in the process. If children notice that parents aren’t happy about their relocation, they’ll probably feel that they are not supportive and exclude them from the process.

You Should Make Ways to Include Parents in This Process

If you’re planning to move to another state alone and going through the relocation process for the first time, you’ll probably want to avoid moving stress and common relocation mistakes. One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to exclude your family from your transition and try to go through everything on your own. Sure, it requires the fine balance in proving that you’re responsible enough to handle everything by yourself and still showing them you care about their opinion, but this is a technique you’ll have to master if you want to stay in a good relationship with them.

How to Include Them in Your Life Before and After the Move

As people get older, they require more attention and are often afraid of being left alone. This is why you shouldn’t be rough and hurt your parents’ feelings by leaving them completely clueless about what’s happening in your life, even though you might not need their assistance. Some of the convenient ways to include them are:

Show Your Parents That You’re Ready and Responsible to Start a New Chapter

Once you decide where to live and find your dream apartment, you’ll probably need to prove that you’re responsible enough to live there on your own and take care of yourself. Some of the tasks you’ll need to handle as a young adult living alone are:

How to show them you’re ready for all of these responsibilities? It is for the best that you start dealing with them before leaving your old place. For example, assist your mother with chores such as washing dishes or doing laundry, ask your dad to let you pay utilities for a month, and show them you’re financially responsible by starting to save money to move at least a few months in advance.

Try to Set a Budget Before Relocating to a New Home and Do Your Best to Stick to It, Whether You’re a Student or Not

One of the most important parts of planning a move to another city is being financially prepared for this major step. How to achieve this? Well, first of all, you’ll have to be aware of all your expenses so far. For example, if you’re a shopaholic and tend to spend all of your money on clothes, that can be fine if your parents cover all other expenses, such as food and utilities. Now that you’re leaving your parents’ house, you have to set your list of priorities. Buying yourself food and paying for rent will be more important than getting a pair of sneakers every month. This is something you need to sacrifice for overall well-being, but we’re sure you can deal with it.

Once you put down all of the potential monthly expenses on a piece of paper, you can add an average rent price and other costs into the final calculation and come up with the approximate costs of living. Some other things you need to consider are the professional relocation services you should get from cross-country movers. This can make the whole relocation process much easier, especially if you have already downsized for a move.

Rely on These Tips if You Want to Save Money and Stay Responsible When Moving to a New Home

If you want to learn how to move away from your parents, you’re probably interested in finding the cheapest ways to move out of state. Some of the things you should consider if you want to avoid unnecessary expenses are:

  • Finding a roommate (your parents will also feel less worried if you’re not completely on your own),
  • Using public transportation (in your mothers’ head, this can be less troublesome than you driving every day),
  • Learning how to cook healthy home-made meals (taking care of your health is one of the ways to show that you’re responsible),
  • Learning how to take care of your household and do small repairs on your own.

This video might be helpful for learning how to organize your schedule and chores without your mother’s or father’s convenient assistance that you’re so used to.

Now That You Know How to Move Out of Your Parents Home, the Only Thing Left Is to Actually Do It

Now that you’re familiar with all the tips for moving out of parents’ house and how to make this process easier, you should learn some of the best relocation hacks that will help you plan your relocation and move to a big city without experiencing any problems. If you carefully follow our tips, you probably already know how to write a substantial relocation expenses checklist and how to save on relocation costs. Of course, one of the ways to move out of your parents’ house without hurting their feelings is letting them still support you financially and emotionally, but that doesn’t mean that you get to be irresponsible.

One of the many benefits of relocation is that you’ll learn how to balance your personal needs, your parents’ requirements and support, and many life opportunities that will eventually come up. Distance doesn’t mean anything if you love your family – you can always find a way to include them in your life, at least virtually if you’re in the other part of the country. Just a quick video call where your mom can help you pick perfect wallpapers for your apartment can make her whole day better. She’ll still feel included in important decisions, and you’ll probably worry less knowing that you didn’t pick something that she won’t approve of.

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